Advice to my Younger and Infertile Self

Eloise Edington  |   16 Sep 2021

Fertility Help Hub know just how arduous that road to fertility can be. For this reason, blogger, Jess Veit, shares words of advice to her younger self as she underwent IVF treatment.

Read on to find out what Jess’s thoughts for those undergoing IVF or any other fertility treatments.

Words by Jess Veit

The other night I was lying in bed with my baby boy curled up next to me, thinking about the long road it took finally to be here in this moment. I thought about all the things I wish I had known before stepping foot inside a fertility clinic, in order not to have been completely blindsided when things took a hard left. 

I am not sure if I would have taken any of my own advice, but there is a big part of me that will always wonder if it would have made the years easier or any less painful.


So, here it is… a little advice to my younger self:

♡ Advocate for yourself and make your voice loud and clear. Remember, you are paying these fertility doctors a lot of money and time for their services. You are not a number and your voice and concerns deserve to be heard.

♡ Don’t stop living your life because of treatments or life during infertility. Take those vacations, go on those dates with your partner and have fun with friends and family. Life will continue to happen and don’t let infertility rob you of anything more than it already has.

Related Article – Self-Care & Managing Your Relationship During IVF

♡ IVF, or any fertility intervention for that matter, is not a guarantee of pregnancy. You might get lucky on your first try but, if you don’t, keep trying. You must fall in order to learn. Dust yourself off and keep digging, keep climbing. 

♡ You are in charge of your story.  If you need a break, take one.  If you’re done fighting, tap out. You are not quitting; you are doing what’s best for you and that is winning. You matter. 

Related Article – Choosing You – Why I Chose to Walk Away from IVF

♡ Ask for help and don’t be afraid to accept that help when it is offered. There will be many days where you physically cannot go on. so never feel ashamed or afraid to reach out to your support system. Find a Tribe and keep them close. 

♡ There will also be many days where this diagnosis will try and break you, but don’t let it win! You are stronger and fiercer than you realize and you will persevere through it all, even on the days when you feel like you can’t go on.

Related Article – TTC Community – What did You Miss at The Fertility Show?

♡ You will have to take many medications which will trick your mind into thinking your body is broken or sick.  Break free from those thoughts.  You are worthy and you are far from broken.

♡ You will become angry with God. You will scream and yell at him for making you suffer and that is OK.   He can take it.  He understands.

Related Article – How I Conceived Naturally with PCOS Against the Odds

I share this advice because together we can inform, advocate and support those on their journey. In my eyes, the more you know the more empowered you become. We write our story and dictate our happiness and hope.

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